Presidential Calamity
by KFD
Summary: A Liley twoshot. Hopefully the first of many. These two are based around President Truman and Doris Day. Enjoy the Liley Love!
1. Sushi

Alright Lilly, you can do this. It's just an American History test. You spent hours studying it. Miley even made a dance for you. The dance! Focus on that, on Miley dancing around. In your room. In her underwear.

"Truscott! Eyes down!"

Stupid Kunkle. How dare she be our substitute teacher and have the nerve to stop me imagining Miley in her underwear. She's just jealous, she's never had the love of a Tennessee woman.

Neither have you, says a voice in the back of my head but I banish it by using my brain to answer the posed question.

12. Who was the 33rd President and historical significance does he have?

33rd President? Was that in the dance? I cast my mind back to the weekend. Miley's angelic voice invades my mind.

At 30, there's Coolidge, cool for a guy his age.

Then Hoover who's better than any dust mover.

My concentration cuts out as Mind-Miley does a particularly provocative dance move. Why did she have to dance? I would have been fine with her just singing. It would still be insanely distracting, but at least I could learn the words. I'd even know exactly how Miley moved her lips as she sang it, in case I ever forgot the words. That would have been nice, I'm good with remembering tunes and I could have just re-created the lip movements, put the tune with it and figured it out from there. The song! Focus Truscott! Coolidge, Hoover, someone, someone and then Kennedy at some point?

I am so failing this test.

Alright, now you're going to block her pretty body out and focus on the voice. Coolidge, Hoover, not important then Hiroshima? That can't be it. Nagasaki? Okay, I know I'm hungry but enough with the sushi! Just because yummy fishy's are named after the two Japanese cities President Truman had atom bombs dropped on-

Oh!

I quickly scribble something about Truman and two cities worth of dead people so I can continue picturing Miley's 'Old, Dead or Texan Guys' dance. I fold my arms and sigh as her arms start moving along with the tune in my head. She gets to what I assume is Truman's line and nearly falls out of her chair trying to re-create the hip gyration in the dance.

Why she needed to put in her new 'more adult' moves into a dance that only I'm going to see is beyond my comprehension. She spent hours convincing her dad that they weren't to provocative and she goes and puts them in a silly little dance for American History class? Poor girl has lost her mind.

But Mr Stewart does need to lighten up. She is only going to be doing them in front of people who have no idea who Hannah Montana really is and are probably never going to see her again.

Besides, it's not like she's going to give private proformances for any hormone-filled teenagers that daydream about her in American History tests.

**A/N:**_ Okay, this is mainly a procrastination thing. I'm considering doing this as a series of two-shots based around the events, people and places mentioned in Billy Joel's _We Didn't Start the Fire. _Please review, your comments are greatly appreciated._


	2. Corsets

Her head is in my lap and I think she's asleep. The credits of _Love Actually_ play in my ears as I poke my best friend in the side.

"Lilly, are you asleep?" I whisper quietly, before I think about how stupid it sounds.

"Help!" I worry slightly as she begins to talk in her sleep. My distress is quelled and Lilly proves that you shouldn't have a hot dog, a milkshake and a whole bottle of Solo before sleep.

"Hannah? Diana? Whatever your name is, save me from the Day-bots! They're going to make me wear a corset!" I lean in closer to get a good look at her expression; I can't help but wonder if she is faking her unconscious state. I exhale sharply and she jolts awake.

The next thing I know, there are a whole bunch of pretty white lights and a very loud Lilly. "Oh my God, are you okay?" Her voice is distressed but my throbbing head prevents me from wondering why. I'm still seeing lights as I lift my head off of the back of the lounge. Lilly's weight disappears and I instantly miss the contact between us.

"Oh my God, your nose is bleeding!"

"Lilly!" I yell as I try to stand. "I am neither yours nor God, so stop saying that!" I miss the disappointed look on her face as I fall back onto the seat, wishing I was her's.

"Oh almighty Miley, please forgive me for being so assuming?" Lilly pauses to rush over and kneel at my feet. "Will you be mine to worship forever?" Her face is screwed up tightly and she has her hands in front of her in a pathetically overdone romantic movement.

"Well, if you absolutely have to," I reply, all thoughts of my aching head disappear as Lilly laughs at my air head voice and outstretched hand. She then shocked us both by grabbing the offered hand and placing a kiss on my ring finger. "Loufoque Lilly," my voice says in a decidedly French accent. Lilly looks torn for a few seconds before a nervous smile settles on her lips. She takes in a deep breath before talking.

"I love it when you speak French."

The tomboy tugs on my hand and my arm straightens. Elation overwhelms me as my best friend begins to place a trail of butterfly kisses along my arm. She maneuvers herself next to me, to gain better access to my upper arm. Lilly takes my slight moan as an indication to continue. Her gentle breath tickles the point where my neck meets my shoulder.

"Tell me to stop," she demands softly, she sounds scared. "Tell me to stop or I'm going to do something we are both going to regret."

"Lilly," her head looks up as I call quietly, "please don't stop." At my command, her hand grabs my neck and pulls my lips swiftly onto hers.

Several minutes later, we come up for air.

"Day-bots forcing you into corsets? Was it the reference in _Grease_ or actually her in _Calamity Jane_ that did it?"


End file.
